10 Ways to Get Yourself Out of a Funk and Fast!

Recently I have been coaching people on how to lift those grey-skied blues. Here’s some go-to advice for shifting those heavy and funky feelings to brightness and lightness.

10 Ways to Get Yourself Out of a Funk and Fast!

1. Check out your biological balance. Take an inventory:

• Are you going to bed at a decent hour? How is your sleep?

• Are you eating well and keeping your blood sugars stable?

• Could you be Vitamin D deficient or are your Vitamin B stores low? • Are you stressing your liver with too much alcohol and processed foods?

• Are you dieting or not eating enough calories?

• Our bodies work hard to keep a chemical equilibrium at all times– but sometimes we need to consciously work on helping with that process.

A chemical imbalance can (and will) absolutely affect our moods. So good sleep, nutrition and self care are not a panacea– they are critical in helping us regain emotional balance. If you are struggling with sleep, it’s really important to address it. Be mindful of what works for you and which foods make you feel worse, then respect that knowledge by doing your best to nourish yourself well.

2. Do time with the issues. As much as we would like to be able to simply transcend our worst mental and emotional struggles, we need to acknowledge them and take a look. Ignoring them is completely useless– our issues will continue to grow and upset us until they have our full attention. Acknowledging negative emotions is not the same as indulging them. Our feelings are there to help us understand and explore the situation better. Don’t let them run you over; allow them to guide you. It is helpful to write them down. Start with a feeling: “I feel disappointed” and then go further– “I feel disappointed about….” Go deeper again. Whatever the feeling, it is completely worth the time and energy to spend a little longer defining it more specifically. Remember that specifics are more manageable than vague feelings. Do not be afraid to identify whatever it is that you are angry, sad, scared, or frustrated about. These feelings are valid and need to be acknowledged before they can then be released. If you are struggling to identify your feelings, consider talking with a friend, spiritualist or life coach to help bring some clarity to what you are experiencing. If you discover that you have a lot of fear that is creating your funk, it’s time to release them for they then can become a source of what is to follow and we don’t want to create fear based realities.

3. Write about it. Journaling is not just for sentimental types! Writing down your thoughts can be extremely helpful in crystallizing your thoughts and feelings. It doesn’t matter at all what you write about– just put down whatever comes to your mind. This has an incredibly clarifying and freeing effect. At the beginning of the day, you get to notice and release all of the things that are clouding your mind as you begin. This process is very helpful for me whenever I feel stuck creatively or overwhelmed with my work or any other kind of funk.

4. Create something. Using the artistic/ intuitive parts of your brain can help you bring understanding to the parts of your life that you cannot logically comprehend. Likewise, there are things that you cannot express through words– so use your creative side, engage your senses, or move your body through dance as a way of expressing yourself. This could also come in the form of learning a new skill– which helps get us out of our heads and more into our bodies. I like to express myself through my pottery class and of course, writing songs and acting.

5. Channel your energy in a positive way. When I am feeling upset about something, my house usually looks cleaner than usual. Frustration really gets me cleaning, as does trying to problem-solve. If you are feeling stuck, consider your surroundings– are things piling up around you? What is your living space doing for your mood? Clearing out clutter and improving your environment can really help you shift your own energy, and focusing on a task like this can also give you space to think and work some things out. The other resource is for letting go of clothes you no longer wear. One thing that keeps me from clearing clothes out is the knowledge that these garments are worth something, and it makes it hard for me to just get rid of them but once I do I feel lighter and freer and that is worth something in itself!

6. Get Bodywork. Have you ever heard the saying, “We carry our issues in our tissues?” It’s true. Getting massage or energy work, or acupuncture from a talented practitioner can be extremely helpful as you navigate life changes and difficult situations. Releasing tensions in your body helps in also letting go of tensions and anxieties in your mind. I have witnessed powerful personal transformations as a result of effective bodywork treatments. I particularly recommend Cranio Sacral Therapy and my personal favorite is my body miracle worker – John Godfrey. If you are interested in his services, email me! A hot bath with Epsom salts is also a powerful way to relieve muscle tension, stress and helps detoxify the body. The salts are an incredibly inexpensive way to go. Meditation is an excellent mind-body exercise to help you release stress and restore internal balance as well as creative visualization, which is incredibly powerful and works in just a few minutes!

7. Give in to it, for a time. Make an appointment with yourself to be in your funk, and to explore those feelings. In the past, making a mixed tape (or CD) of songs that I felt embodied my emotional feelings, helped me. I listened to that music, and felt those feelings until they eased. This is the opposite of the advice most of us get. “If you’re feeling sad, put on some peppy music! Dance it out!” Although that can work sometimes, but I feel this approach is more of a band-aid than a healing process for what you resist persists. My go-to is often to clear my schedule, ask for the space I need from my family, buy myself some flowers, and take a hot bath. There may be weeping, there may be a sad movie; there may be some chocolate cake involved. Whatever feels right to you for nurturing yourself and allowing yourself to be where you’re at is what you need. Giving yourself space for self-reflection and expression is the way to move it out of your space. It’s a case of unexpressed emotions that hasn’t been given its own time to be expressed that lingers and doesn’t shift until you allow it to come out.

8. Give to others - be with others. In this era we are in, isolation can prevail. We’ve given so much time to the electronic age we have forgotten how to connect to one another. Connect with friends again in person or participate in a class or group activity. Even getting out where there are other people can help lift spirits. Kindness can also heal, and gratitude does, too. When you begin to feel sorry for yourself, make a point of doing something kind for someone else. Reach out and thank someone for the joy or nourishment they have brought into your life. This will take your mind off of your own issues and open the world up to you just a bit. And guess what? Kindness and good deeds are proven mood-lifters! Even making a donation to a good cause helps. So it’s totally worth making a point of doing it daily

9. Go outside and move your body. Taking a walk in nature is helpful in many ways. Invite a friend to walk with you if you want, and then you get three-for-one therapy: community, exercise, and talk therapy. I like to walk alone and think– it can be very clarifying. For me, there is no bad mood that can’t be dispelled by a walk in nature. Sometimes when I get there I am very skeptical about whether or not it will work, because I’m feeling so bad. But it always does,every time! Exercising increases the oxygen available to your brain, and helps you to solve problems. So when you feel stuck or overwhelmed, take some time to see something beautiful, breathe deeply and move your body outside.

10. Play! Playing or having fun may feel like the last thing you want to do. But it can be so helpful. Laughter is an incredible stress reliever, and going out and doing something frivolous or silly helps put life back into perspective. This is also a great way to bring your family into your life when you have been brooding. Watch funny movies, look for good stand-up comics, play silly games with your kids. Do cartwheels if you know how– being upside down once in a while is good for you, too! Whatever it is that makes you smile, laugh, or forget about all the things that are on your mind– do more of that, and make it a priority.

Know that the times of sadness, inertia and “funk” are a really normal part of life. There is nothing wrong with you, and it’s important to have times of reflection to process big and small changes in life. Give yourself plenty of grace, and reach out and ask for help when you need it and always know, I am always here for you!

50 Reasons to GET HAPPY - We Are Living In The Best Of Times!

50 Reasons to GET HAPPY – We Are Living In The Best Of Times!

Recently I was speaking with a doctor who retired after a 35-year career. I asked him how much the medicine world had changed during the past three decades. "Oh, it’s changed incredibly," he said. He listed off a ton of examples. Stroke and heart disease are way down. Cancer survival rates are have gone up considerably. We're better at diagnosing, treating, preventing, and curing disease than we have been in history.

This is interesting: In 1900, 1% of American women giving birth died in labor. Today, the five-year mortality rate for localized breast cancer is 1.2%. Being pregnant 100 years ago was almost as dangerous as having breast cancer is today.

The doctor commented that the problem is that these advances happen so slowly over time, you probably don't hear about them nor are they being celebrated in the news. If cancer survival rates improve, for instance, 1% per year, any given year's progress looks unimpressive, but over a few decades, extraordinary progress is made.

Compare health care improvements with the stuff that gets talked about in the news – we hear the news broadcasting about Justin Bieber's arrest -- and you can easily understand why Americans feel pessimistic about the country's direction. We side-step the important news and obsess over trivial news.

Here lies my belief that everything is celebratory yet people find so many reasons to be unhappy. Consider these 50 facts that demonstrate that we are ALIVE through the most amazing period in world history!

1. In the U.S. our life expectancy at birth was 39 years in 1800, 49 years in 1900, 68 years in 1950, and 79 years today. The average newborn today can expect to live an entire generation longer than his great-grandparents could.

2. A flu pandemic in 1918 infected 500 million people and killed as many as 100 million. Author John Barry describes the illness as if "someone were hammering a wedge into your skull just behind the eyes, and body aches so intense they felt like bones breaking." Today, with our knowledge and understanding of the flu it’s now considered as common and non-threatening as the common cold. Besides that, there are countless remedies, medical help and homeopathic avenues we can pursue to overcome it.

3. In 1950, 23 people per 100,000 Americans died each year in traffic accidents, according to the Census Bureau. That fell to 11 per 100,000 by 2009. If the traffic mortality rate had not declined, 37,800 more Americans would have died last year than actually did. In the time it will take you to read this article, one American is alive who would have died in a car accident 60 years ago.

4. Popular Mechanics magazine in 1949 made a courageous prediction that one day a computer could weigh less than 1 ton. Today your phone weighs less than a slice of pizza.

5. The average American now retires at age 62. One hundred years ago, the average American died at age 51. Appreciate your latter years -- your ancestors didn't get that opportunity.

6. In his 1770s book The Wealth of Nations, Adam Smith wrote: "It is not uncommon in the highlands of Scotland for a mother who has borne 20 children not to have 2 alive." Infant mortality in America has dropped from 58 per 1,000 births in 1933 to less than six per 1,000 births in 2010, according to the World Health Organization. There are about 11,000 births in America each day, so this improvement means more than 200,000 infants now survive each year who wouldn't have 80 years ago. That's like adding a city the size of Boise, Idaho, every year.

7. America saw an average of 20,919 murders per year in the 1990s, and 16,211 per year in the 2000s, according to the FBI. If the murder rate had not fallen, 47,000 more Americans would have been killed in the last decade than actually were. That's more than the population of Biloxi, Miss.

8. Despite a surge in airline travel, there were half as many fatal plane accidents in 2012 than there were in 1960, according to the Aviation Safety Network.

9. No one has died from a new nuclear weapon attack since 1945. If you went back to 1950 and asked the world's smartest political scientists, they would have told you the odds of seeing that happen would be close to 0%. You don't have to be very imaginative to think that the most important news story of the past 70 years is whatdidn't Congratulations, world.

10. People worry that the U.S. economy will end up stagnant like Japan's. Next time you hear that remind yourself: unemployment in Japan hasn't risen above 5.6% in the past quarter of a century, its government corruption ranking has consistently improved, incomes per capita adjusted for purchasing power have grown at a decent rate, and life expectancy has risen by nearly five years.

11. Two percent of American homes had electricity in 1900. J.P Morgan (the man) was one of the first to install electricity in his home, and it required a private power plant on his property. Even by 1950, close to 30% of American homes didn't have electricity. It wasn't until the 1970s that virtually all homes were powered. Adjusted for wage growth, electricity cost more than 10 times as much in 1900 as it does today, according to professor Julian Simon.

12. According to the Federal Reserve, the number of lifetime years spent in leisure -- retirement plus time off during your working years -- rose from 11 years in 1870 to 35 years by 1990. Given the rise in life expectancy, it's probably close to 40 years today. Which is amazing: The average American spends nearly half his life in leisure. If you had told this to the average American 100 years ago, that person would have considered you wealthy beyond imagination.

13. We are having a national discussion about whether a $7.25-per-hour minimum wage is too low. But even adjusted for inflation, the minimum wage wasless than $4 per hour as recently as the late 1940s. The top 1% have captured most of the wage growth over the past three decades, but nearly everyone has grown richer -- much richer -- during the past seven decades.

14. In 1952, 38,000 people contracted polio in America alone, according to the Centers for Disease Control. In 2012, there were fewer than 300 reported cases of polio in the entire world.

15. From 1920 to 1949, an average of 433,000 people died each year globally from "extreme weather events." That figure has plunged to 27,500 per year, according to Indur Goklany of the International Policy Network, largely thanks to "increases in societies' collective adaptive capacities.

16. Worldwide deaths from battle have plunged from 300 per 100,000 people during World War II, to the low teens during the 1970s, to less than 10 in the 1980s, to fewer than one in the 21st century, according to Harvard professor Steven Pinker. "War really is going out of style," he says.

17. Median household income adjusted for inflation was around $25,000 per year during the 1950s. It's nearly double that amount today. We have false nostalgia about the prosperity of the 1950s because our definition of what counts as "middle class" has been inflated -- seethe 34% rise in the size of the median American home in just the past 25 years. If you dig into how the average "prosperous" American family lived in the 1950s, I think you'll find a standard of living we'd call "poverty" today.

18. Reported rape per 100,000 Americans dropped from 42.3 in 1991 to 27.5 in 2010, according to the FBI. Robbery has dropped from 272 per 100,000 in 1991 to 119 in 2010. There were nearly 4 million fewer property crimes in 2010 than there were in 1991, which is amazing when you consider the U.S. population grew by 60 million during that period.

19. According to the Census Bureau, only one in 10 American homes had air conditioning in 1960. That rose to 49% in 1973, and 89% today -- the 11% that don't are mostly in cold climates. Simple improvements like this have changed our lives in immeasurable ways.

20. Almost no homes had a refrigerator in 1900, according to Frederick Lewis Allan's The Big Change, let alone a car. Today you can buy a car with a refrigerator in it!

21. The average cost of around-trip airline ticket fell 50% from 1978 to 2011, according to Airlines for America. Flying was a privilege only the elite could afford. My mother had to spend a month’s worth of wages in 1970 just to afford a one way ticket from Texas to Los Angeles.

22. According to the Census Bureau, the average new home now has more bathrooms than occupants.

23. According to the Census Bureau, in 1900 there was one housing unit for every five Americans. Today, there's one for every three. In 1910 the average home had 1.13 occupants per room. By 1997 it was down to 0.42 occupants per room.

24. Professor Julian Simon reported that the average American house or apartment is twice as large as the average house or apartment in Japan, and three times larger than the average home or apartment in Russia.

25. Relative to hourly wages, the cost of an average new car has fallen fourfold since 1915.

26. Google Maps is free. If you think about this for a few moments, it's really astounding. It's probably the single most useful piece of software ever invented, and it's free for anyone to use.

27. High school graduation rates are at a 40-year high, according to Education Week.

28. The death rate from strokes has declined by 75% since the 1960s, according to the National Institutes of Health. Death from heart attacks has plunged, too: If the heart attack survival had had not declined since the 1960s, the number of Americans dying each year from heart disease would be more than 1 million higher than it currently is.

29. In 1900, African Americans had an illiteracy rate of nearly 45%, according to the Census Bureau. Today, it's statistically close to zero.

30. People talk about how expensive college is today, but a century ago fewer than one in 20 Americans ever stepped foot in a university. College wasn't an option at any price for some minorities because of segregation just six decades ago.

31. The average American’s work week went from 66 hours in 1850, to 51 hours in 1909, to 34.8 today, according to the Federal Reserve. Enjoy your extra time!

32. Incomes have grown so much faster than food prices that the average American household now spends less than half as much of its income on food as it did in the 1950s. Relative to wages, the price of food has declined more than 90% since the 19th century, according to the Bureau of Labor Statistics.

33. As of March 2013, there were 8.99 million millionaire households in the U.S., according to the Spectrum Group. Put them together and they would make the largest city in the country, and the 18thlargest city in the world, just behind Tokyo. We talk a lot about wealth concentration in the United States, but we don’t realize it's not just the very top that has done well.

34. More than 40% of adults smoked in 1965, according to the Centers for Disease Control. By 2011, 19% did.

35. In 1900, 44% of all American jobs were in farming. Today, around 2% are. We've become so efficient at the basic need of feeding ourselves that nearly half the population can now work on other stuff.

36. One of the reasons Social Security and Medicare are underfunded is that the average American is living longer than ever before. I think this is literally the best problem to have.

37. In 1940, less than 5% of the adult population held a bachelor's degree or higher. By 2012, more than 30% did, according to the Census Bureau.

38. U.S. oil production in September was the highest it’s beensince 1989, and growth shows no sign of slowing. We produced 57% more oil in America in September 2013 than we did in September 2007. The International Energy Agency projects that America will be the world's largest oil producer as soon as 2015. Which also means that we will be more nationally independent for these precious resources.

39. The average American car got 13 miles per gallon in 1975, and more than 26 miles per gallon in 2013, according to the Energy Protection Agency. This has an effect identical to cutting the cost of gasoline in half.

40. Annual inflation in the United States hasn't been above 10% since 1981 and has been below 5% in 77% of years over the past seven decades. When you consider all the hatred directed toward the Federal Reserve, this is astounding.

41. The percentage of Americans age 65 and older who live in poverty has dropped from nearly 30% in 1966 to less than 10% by 2010. For the elderly, the war on poverty has pretty much been won.

42. Adjusted for inflation, the average monthly Social Security benefit for retirees has increased from $378 in 1940 to $1,277 by 2010. What used to be a safety net is now a proper pension.

43. If you think Americans aren't prepared for retirement today, you should have seen what it was like a century ago. In 1900, 65% of men over age 65 were still in the labor force. By 2010, that figure was down to 22%. The entire concept of retirement is unique to the past few decades. Half a century ago, most Americans worked until they died.

44. According to The Economist, from 1920 to 1980, an average of 395 people per 100,000 died from famine worldwide each decade. During the 2000s, that fell to 3 per 100,000.

45. The cost of solar panels has declined by 75% since 2008, according to the Department of Energy. From what I understand, the sun’s services are free.

46. As recently as 1950, nearly 40% of American homes didn't have a telephone. Today, there are 500 million Internet-connected devices in America, or enough for 5.7 per household.

47. According toAT&Tarchives and the Dallas Fed, a three-minute phone call from New York to San Francisco cost $341 in 1915, and $12.66 in 1960, adjusted for inflation. Today, Republic Wireless offers unlimited talk, text, and data for $10 a month.

48. In 1990, the American auto industry produced 7.15 vehicles per auto employee. In 2010 it produced 11.2 vehicles per employee. Manufacturing efficiency has improved dramatically.

49. $34,000 a year is all you need to be in the richest 1% of the world, according to Branko Milanovic's, the World Bank economist author of book The Haves and the Have-Nots. To be in the top half of the globe you need to earn just $1,225 a year. For the top 20%, it's $5,000 per year. Enter the top 10% with $12,000 a year. To be included in the top 0.1% requires an annual income of $70,000. America's poorest are some of the world's richest.

50. Only 4% of humans get to live in America. Odds are you're one of them. We've got it made. Be thankful.

We Americans tend to have very short memories, so remember: It’s time to GET HAPPY. We have A LOT to be joyful and thankful for!

Where Does Success Live And How Can I Get It To Move In With Me?

Where Does Success Live And How Can I Get It To Move In With Me?

 

There are just two reasons why you haven't achieved the things you’d like to have or experience in life.

1. You’re blocked by something external

2. You won’t because of something internal

The Truth Is: almost everyone who succeeds, knows the answer is number #2 - the reason they have failed is because of themselves. Not because someone won’t let them, lack of funds, lack of intelligence, lack of resources, lack of weather – whatever. It is, without fail, their own fault. Always.

If this doesn’t sound accurate, consider the flipside: those who fail always assume it’s not their fault. With that attitude, your ego is forever letting itself off the hook. You can’t learn from your experiences, except maybe that you shouldn’t have even tried, because – well – that wild, wild world was just super-mean to you again.

Try listening to a lot of normal conversations: it’s just the ol’ ego making excuses, hiding out and blocking you from what truly inspires you and makes life worthwhile. “I’ve been here 6 years in the same job and they still haven’t promoted me!” “I know, me too! It’s so unfair…”

As Don Draper would say: I hate to break it to you, but there is no big lie. There is no system. The universe is indifferent. Whenever “it” or “they”, “he” or “she” is to blame, you’re just diverting the blame. Because the only thing that matters is what you can control: what-are-you-going-to-do-about-it?

There are always situations when you really can’t have something that you don’t control. Maybe you dream of being a championship triathlete, but you were born without legs. Well of course, but even that doesn’t have to stop you from achieving beyond your imagination! Why do we make excuses?

Making excuses can make us feel better.

Excuses are like painkillers for our self-respect. Surely they evolved with this purpose. For not everyone can succeed all the time, and if you can’t, it’s better that you don’t become too depressed about it. But the chances are the things that you want – that you want the most - are not fast cars, Angelina Jolie’s life or a giant catapult to the moon.

Most of us crave fundamentally simple things: love, respect, security, health, significance. These things don’t require that we’re born to wealthy parents, or with perfect genes. If you’re reading this, the chances are you have access to education, sanitation, medicine, freedom of speech, shelter and the sum of the world’s knowledge (The Google), and that you take them for granted. For over 150,000 years human life would have utterly sucked compared to now, and you’ve been born in the last 70 or so, in the blessed minority, when it doesn’t. You’re so lucky you can’t imagine. So where does the answer to the subject of attaining success lie?

The Problem (and solution) Lies Within YOU!

Whenever you hit a wall: find what you can do about it, do it, and forget anything else. All the other stuff just consumes your attention and accomplishes nothing. The solutions to all your problems are probably so obvious, you likely already know them. The trick is simply acknowledging it’s your responsibility alone to make it happen! Yes, Dorothy, It's that simple. 

Busting The Psychic Tarot Card Reader Myth!

Busting The Psychic Tarot Card Reader Myth!

Clients who come to me at Intuitive Life By Sterling for my tarot card services are often confused and bewildered about how the intuitive and tarot card process works. For a lot of people, it often conjures up images of a gypsy mystic gazing into a crystal ball and foreseeing a pre-determined good or bad future, accompanied by predictions, images of past, present and future relations, incidents and sometimes even detecting prevalent bad energy that needs removal. Most of this is misconstrued or simply fabricated and untrue.

What I do at Intuitive Life By Sterling, as well as what some other legitimate psychics do, is detect what clients unconsciously and consciously create or materialize in their lives by their own hand. No one can place a spell on us, nor can we place a spell on anyone else. All humans are here for two reasons: to create and experience our creations, as well as to experience others’ creations. What we choose to create is entirely up to us.

There is nothing inherently good or bad in the world, as such. All that was and is created equally is assigned a specific value or use. What we determine in our western modern world that is good or bad was largely created by leaders and we - the majority - agreed to label it “good” or “bad.” Now that may leave you thinking, “If there is no inherent good or bad, then how do I determine what I choose to create?” You create consciously or unconsciously by making choices that are aligned with what you want to experience in the world. There are, of course, consequences to our choices, as well. So, although there isn’t anything inherently “bad” about stealing because we, as a majority, agreed to make it an illegal act, you will probably end up in court and possibly jail - and that’s not all. You will also create the energy that attracts someone to steal from you, too. What you create is what you attract, as well. Is that what you want to experience?

I believe that all tarot card readings are essentially good because they indicate what’s being manifested in its infantile form and if we like where we are heading, we can sit back and enjoy the ride. If we don’t like what we are creating, then we can change our course of direction and get back on track, so we can reach our true, intended destination.

We’ve all heard of the stereotypical story of a psychic who is able to predict that in five years, a client will be married to Bill or Linda and have two children. What is really happening in this scenario, however, is that the psychic planted an idea into the client’s mind that was accepted, became an unconscious thought, and was eventually realized as a self-fulfilling prophecy. The client seeker actually adopted the idea and helped create it - into reality. In actuality, there is nothing necessarily wrong with this. The seeker probably liked the idea and thought, “Yes, it would be perfect timing for me to find someone in 5 years and marry and start a family” or they thought, “Well, if I have to wait for five years, that’s better than ten!”

With my background in psychology, astrology, life coaching, numerology – as well as my intuitive abilities – I help guide people where they desire to go and, importantly, uncover things they unconsciously create that may be out of alignment with what they ultimately want. This gives the controls back to my clients, so they can be responsible and act as the sole author of their lives with eyes wide open. Empowering my clients is the foundation of my work and is what I am committed to. Other legitimate psychics or intuitives provide some of these areas of expertise also.

The bottom line for finding a reputable psychic comes down to how you feel about the person who you consult with. Inquire about what you are looking for within the services that the psychic offers. All psychics have their own personal way of working. Some simply will call out things they perceive, others are great for clarifying information in your life and offering solid guidance. If possible, call and have a brief conversation to “feel” the psychic out. It is advisable to not let your pocketbook dictate to where you go. Often times this can lead to spending more money than you are comfortable with. Look for someone who is committed to assisting you, not the other way around. 

For more information about tarot CLICK HERE

How Do You View LOVE?

Love is exhilarating, scary, fun, adventurous, risky, all-encompassing……

How do you view love? What are the stories/ideas you have about love, your love life. Do you find that the same kind of stories keep repeating themselves? Or do you tend to swing from one extreme of a story to another, such as you initiate a break up in one relationship but in the next relationship it’s you who gets dumped.

Often I have clients who come to me looking for love confused by their isolation and loneliness. They’ve never taken a look deep inside where their “love story” resides.

Having the tools to transform these stories/ideas are key to changing our experience of our world within and the world that surrounds us. Loving ourselves first is not a new idea but Sometimes our ideas of loving ourselves is actually an attempt to create love for ourselves in an attempt to cover up self-loathing. It’s like putting icing on a mud pie - the taste is not so sweet. We have to be genuine with ourselves and locate where and why we experience self-loathing before we can transform it. This is the work I stand by. It’s when we locate certain things in a certain way that we experience the “aha” moment that allows a powerful and permanent shift to occur within us. Allowing us access to what we want in our lives. Able to alter our outcomes in a favorable and most desirable way. Love is …. Looking for you as you are looking for it. Have the love you want. Perfect and ideal? Or leaving something to be desired. neither are right or wrong it really just depends on what you want!

4 Best Kept Secrets To Lasting Love

4 Best Kept Secrets To Lasting Love (and discovering what's important)

 

The world of love is an easily solved mystery of giving. As life unfolds, people are too often filled with anxiety instead of love and serenity. This week I was reminded of the words of Dr. Leo Buscaglia, author of LOVE: "What love we've given we will have forever. What love we fail to give is lost for all eternity."

The secrets to lifelong love are really quite simple. Why? Because love is more than a feeling, it is a decision. Lifelong love asks that we maintain positive illusions, be forgiving, re-ignite oxytocin, and laugh often.

 Maintain positive illusions

 From the research of Marcel Zentner, PhD, of the University of Geneva: "Men and women who continue to maintain that their partner is attractive, funny, kind, and ideal for them in just about every way remain content with each other." How to make love last. (Here is one way you can do this: Relationship Tips: choose to Cherish instead of Criticize).

 Also it is important to be mindful of your partner's unique, genuine qualities and stay in touch with these during happy as well as difficult times.

 Incorporate forgiveness in your life each day

 In Joseph Campbell's The Power of Myth he talked about the essence of marriage, and later discussed this with journalist Bill Moyers on PBS. He called "loyalty" the essence of marriage—"not cheating, not defecting—through whatever trials or suffering, you remain true."

 Bill Moyers added: "The Puritans call marriage the little church within the church. In marriage, every day you love, and every day you forgive. It is an ongoing sacrament—love and forgiveness."

 Re-ignite that oxytocin

 Psychiatrist Dr. Scott Halzman says that natural highs "can produce excitatory neurochemicals that the brain interprets as excitement about your partner, not the activity." He suggests:

 Making love: Sex produces a natural high that can boost oxytocin levels.

Doing something out of your normal routine: Try going to an amusement park or walking in the rain. And if you are walking in the rain, skip puddles or see who can jump into a puddle and make the biggest splash.

Dining at a new restaurant: When you do so, order a dish that is completely unlike anything else you have ever ordered.

These activities will trigger the bonding effect. These and many other thoughts are in his latest book: The Secrets of Happy Families: Eight Keys to Building a Lifetime of Connection and Contentment

Laugh together often

Men like women who laugh at their jokes and women prefer men who make them laugh. A small research study found that women rate funny guys as more intelligent than guys who are not so funny. The research was presented last year at the British Psychological Society Annual Conference in Brighton, England. Why funny guys get the babes - CNN

 And in the often-quoted words of actress Joanne Woodward: "Sexiness wears thin after a while and beauty fades, but to be married to a man who makes you laugh every day, ah, now that's a real treat."

5 Top Reasons NOT To Transform Your Life!!

5 Top Reasons NOT To Transform Your Life!!

 

1. Change is hard AND it’s unfamiliar and if it’s unfamiliar it’s scary! Arrrgh!

2. If you stay with what you know you can expect the same results every time, therefore less room for disappointment.

3. What will others think? Egad!

4. Do something differently when I can do it the same and be on autopilot? Please don’t wake me, I’m only sleeping….(light wafts of The Beatles song, “I’m Only Sleeping” plays softly in the background)…..zzzzzz.

5. Excitement and exhilaration are a form of stress and I am trying to cut down on stress, Thainkkk Youuu.

Many of these concocted reasons are just that – false beliefs that need to be disconnected from our lives. They are simply not true (although they’d like you to think they are).

Now you may be thinking: but how? That was my question about 15 years ago when I started embarking on a long and very curious journey as to how to access the life that only seemed to live in my dreams. What I then created was an airtight system that is not only simple but it’s fun, easy and fast! Now that we’ve visited your world, take a peek at how the others are living and see what you are missing!

5 Top Reasons TO Transform Your Life!!

1. It’s my birthright to live exactly as I truly desire: fully, peacefully, fearlessly, contently, in love, excitedly, happily, abundantly, thoroughly, expressively, completely and dynamically because I’ll have plenty of time to recoil from life and never have to answer to it when I’m dead!

2. I am here to create and experience. That is what I do, that is all I can do so I want to be creating my experiences exactly as ideal as possible! Living to fulfill on my utmost potential (which is limitless, by the way!)

3. Suffering, pain, sadness, confusion, heartache, disappointment, dis-ease, upset, unrest, depression is NOT my true self nor my authentic comfort zone.

4. Actually, I DO deserve unconditional love and to make a difference in the world! That’s what I was put here to do (amongst many other colorful, frolicking things ;))

5. Because I can, I should, I want to and I will! Contrary to popular belief, I’ve got the power! (Ahem, If you can just show me the way….)

This way please

I Was Here - But I've Moved On!

Holding on is being brave, but letting go and moving on is often what makes us stronger and happier.

Here are ten signs it’s time to let go:

Someone expects you to be someone you’re not. – Don’t change who you are for anyone else. It’s wiser to lose someone over being who you are, than to keep them by being someone you’re not. Because it’s easier to mend a broken heart, than it is to piece together a shattered identity. It’s easier to fill an empty space in your life where someone else used to be, than it is to fill the empty space inside yourself where YOU used to be.

A person’s actions don’t match their words. – Everybody deserves somebody who helps them look forward to tomorrow. If someone has the opposite effect on you, because they are consistently inconsistent and their actions don’t match up with their words, it’s time to let them go. It’s always better to be alone than to be in bad company. True friendship is a promise made in the heart – silent, unwritten, unbreakable by distance, and unchangeable by time. Don’t listen to what people say; watch what they do. Your true friends will slowly reveal themselves over time.

You catch yourself forcing someone to love you. – Let us keep in mind that we can’t force anyone to love us. We shouldn’t beg someone to stay when they want to leave. That’s what love is all about – freedom. However, the end of love is not the end of life. It should be the beginning of an understanding that love sometimes leaves for a reason, but never leaves without a lesson. If someone truly loves you, they will never give you a reason to doubt it. Anyone can come into your life and say how much they love you, but it takes someone really special to stay in your life and prove how much they love you. Sometimes it takes awhile to find the right person, but the right person is always worth the wait. Read The Road Less Traveled.

An intimate relationship is based strictly on physical attraction. – Being beautiful is more than how many people you can get to look at you, or how others perceive you at a single glance. It’s about what you live for. It’s about what defines you. It’s about the depth of your heart, and what makes you unique. It’s about being who you are and living out your life honestly. It’s about those little quirks that make you, you. People who are only attracted to you because of your pretty face or nice body won’t stay by your side forever. But the people who can see how beautiful your heart is will never leave you.

Someone continuously breaks your trust. – Love means giving someone the chance to hurt you, but trusting them not to. When you completely trust a person, without any doubt, you’ll automatically get one of two results - a FRIEND for life or a LESSON for life. Either way there’s a positive outcome. Either you confirm the fact that this person cares about you, or you get the opportunity to weed them out of your life and make room for those who do. In the end you’ll discover who’s fake, who’s true, and who would risk it all for you. And trust me, some people will totally surprise you.

Someone continuously overlooks your worth. – Know your worth! When you give yourself to someone who doesn’t respect you, you surrender pieces of your soul that you’ll never get back. There comes a point when you have to let go and stop chasing some people. If someone wants you in their life, they’ll find a way to put you there. Sometimes you just need to let go and accept the fact that they don’t care for you the way you care for them. Let them leave your life quietly. Letting go is oftentimes easier than holding on. We think it’s too hard to let go, until we actually do. Then we ask ourselves, “Why didn’t I do this sooner?”

You are never given a chance to speak your mind. – Sometimes an argument saves a relationship, whereas silence breaks it. Speak up for your heart so that you won’t have regrets. Life is not about making others happy. Life is about being honest and sharing your happiness with others.

You are frequently forced to sacrifice your happiness. – If you allow people to make more withdrawals than deposits in your life, you will be out of balance and in the negative before you know it. Know when to close the account. It’s always better to be alone with dignity than in a relationship that constantly requires you to sacrifice your happiness and self-respect. Read Stumbling on Happiness.

You truly dislike your current situation, routine, job, etc. – It’s better to be a failure at something you love than to succeed at doing something you hate. Don’t let someone who gave up on their dreams talk you out of going after yours. The best thing you can do in life is follow your heart. Take risks. Don’t just make the safe and easy choices because you’re afraid of what might happen. If you do, nothing will ever happen. Chances must be taken, mistakes must be made, and lessons must be learned. It might be an uphill climb, but when you reach that mountaintop it will be worth every ounce of blood, sweat and tears you put into it.

You catch yourself obsessing over, and living in, the past. – Eventually you will overcome the heartache, and forget the reasons you cried, and who caused the pain. Eventually you will realize that the secret to happiness and freedom is not about control or revenge, but in letting things unfold naturally, and learning from your experiences over the course of time. After all, what matters most is not the first, but the final chapter of your life, which unveils the details of how well you wrote your story. So let go of the past, set yourself free, and open your mind to the possibility of new relationships and priceless experiences. What I suggest to my clients: Read The Power of Now.

And the one thing you should never let go of is hope. Remember what you deserve and keep pushing forward. Someday all the pieces will come together. Unimaginably good things will transpire in your life, even if everything doesn’t turn out exactly the way you had anticipated. And you will look back at the times that have passed, smile, and ask yourself, “How did I get through all of that?”

Want To WIN In Life? Give Up These 15 Things!

Here is a list of 15 things which, if you give up on them, will make your life a lot easier and much, much happier. We hold on to so many things that cause us a great deal of pain, stress and suffering – and instead of letting them all go, instead of allowing ourselves to be stress free and happy – we cling on to them. Not anymore. Starting today we will give up on all those things that no longer serve us, and we will embrace change. Ready? Here we go:

1. Give up your need to always be right. There are so many of us who can’t stand the idea of being wrong – wanting to always be right – even at the risk of ending great relationships or causing a great deal of stress and pain, for us and for others. It’s just not worth it. Whenever you feel the ‘urgent’ need to jump into a fight over who is right and who is wrong, ask yourself this question: “Would I rather be right, or would I rather be kind?”Wayne Dyer. What difference will that make? Is your ego really that big?

2. Give up your need for control. Be willing to give up your need to always control everything that happens to you and around you – situations, events, people, etc. Whether they are loved ones, coworkers, or just strangers you meet on the street – just allow them to be. Allow everything and everyone to be just as they are and you will see how much better will that make you feel.

“By letting it go it all gets done. The world is won by those who let it go. But when you try and try. The world is beyond winning.” Lao Tzu

3. Give up on blame. Give up on your need to blame others for what you have or don’t have, for what you feel or don’t feel. Stop giving your powers away and start taking responsibility for your life.

4. Give up your self-defeating self-talk. Oh my. How many people are hurting themselves because of their negative, polluted and repetitive self-defeating mindset? Don’t believe everything that your mind is telling you – especially if it’s negative and self-defeating. You are better than that.

“The mind is a superb instrument if used rightly. Used wrongly, however, it becomes very destructive.” Eckhart Tolle

5. Give up your limiting beliefs about what you can or cannot do, about what is possible or impossible. From now on, you are no longer going to allow your limiting beliefs to keep you stuck in the wrong place. Spread your wings and fly!

“A belief is not an idea held by the mind, it is an idea that holds the mind” Elly Roselle

6. Give up complaining. Give up your constant need to complain about those many, many, maaany things – people, situations, events that make you unhappy, sad and depressed. Nobody can make you unhappy, no situation can make you sad or miserable unless you allow it to. It’s not the situation that triggers those feelings in you, but how you choose to look at it. Never underestimate the power of positive thinking.

7. Give up the luxury of criticism. Give up your need to criticize things, events or people that are different than you. We are all different, yet we are all the same. We all want to be happy, we all want to love and be loved and we all want to be understood. We all want something, and something is wished by us all.

8. Give up your need to impress others. Stop trying so hard to be something that you’re not just to make others like you. It doesn’t work this way. The moment you stop trying so hard to be something that you’re not, the moment you take of all your masks, the moment you accept and embrace the real you, you will find people will be drawn to you, effortlessly.

9. Give up your resistance to change. Change is good. Change will help you move from A to B. Change will help you make improvements in your life and also the lives of those around you. Follow your bliss, embrace change – don’t resist it.

“Follow your bliss and the universe will open doors for you where there were only walls” Joseph Campbell

10. Give up labels. Stop labeling those things, people or events that you don’t understand as being weird or different and try opening your mind, little by little. Minds only work when open. “The highest form of ignorance is when you reject something you don’t know anything about.” Wayne Dyer

11. Give up on your fears. Fear is just an illusion, it doesn’t exist – you created it. It’s all in your mind. Correct the inside and the outside will fall into place.

“The only thing we have to fear, is fear itself.” Franklin D. Roosevelt

12. Give up your excuses. Send them packing and tell them they’re fired. You no longer need them. A lot of times we limit ourselves because of the many excuses we use. Instead of growing and working on improving ourselves and our lives, we get stuck, lying to ourselves, using all kind of excuses – excuses that 99.9% of the time are not even real.

13. Give up the past. I know, I know. It’s hard. Especially when the past looks so much better than the present and the future looks so frightening, but you have to take into consideration the fact that the present moment is all you have and all you will ever have. The past you are now longing for – the past that you are now dreaming about – was ignored by you when it was present. Stop deluding yourself. Be present in everything you do and enjoy life. After all life is a journey not a destination. Have a clear vision for the future, prepare yourself, but always be present in the now.

14. Give up attachment. This is a concept that, for most of us is so hard to grasp and I have to tell you that it was for me too, (it still is) but it’s not something impossible. You get better and better at with time and practice. The moment you detach yourself from all things, (and that doesn’t mean you give up your love for them – because love and attachment have nothing to do with one another, attachment comes from a place of fear, while love… well, real love is pure, kind, and self less, where there is love there can’t be fear, and because of that, attachment and love cannot coexist) you become so peaceful, so tolerant, so kind, and so serene. You will get to a place where you will be able to understand all things without even trying. A state beyond words.

15. Give up living your life to other people’s expectations. Way too many people are living a life that is not theirs to live. They live their lives according to what others think is best for them, they live their lives according to what their parents think is best for them, to what their friends, their enemies and their teachers, their government and the media think is best for them. They ignore their inner voice, that inner calling. They are so busy with pleasing everybody, with living up to other people’s expectations, that they lose control over their lives. They forget what makes them happy, what they want, what they need….and eventually they forget about themselves. You have one life – this one right now – you must live it, own it, and especially don’t let other people’s opinions distract you from your path.

The Year's Not Over YET! It's Tune Up Time!

If you are feeling behind schedule, or disappointed with results or feel overwhelmed by the changes this year, then take a moment to reflect and read up on what is guiding your internal energies. We are about half way through the year....

There's still more time to make the difference! 

Your 2014 Horoscope.

With the New Year in full swing, many people are beginning to create a vision of how they’d like this year to unfold. For some people, this has conjured up exhilaration, excitement, and great expectations. For others, it may elicit feelings of trepidation, resistance and even terror.

Because we are all busy, here is a simplified break down of what the year has to offer according to birth-date:

Air babies (Aquarius: Jan. 20-Feb. 18; Libra: Sept. 23-Oct. 22; Gemini: May 21-June 20) will fly the friendly, expansive skies, happily loving the refreshing feeling of what this year has to offer. Your brilliant mind will welcome new thinking that this year offers. Seeing things with a fresh perspective is like a breath of springtime – the very instrument that’ll drum up excitement about creating all areas of your life! If you can think it, then up you can drink it up!

Fire starters (Aries: March 21-April 19; Leo: July 23-Aug. 22; Sagittarius: Nov. 22-Dec. 21) love new and exciting opportunities in order to act on new ideas and embrace all of the challenges that go with it. With each of the new opportunities that come your way, it’s a great time to make new travel and adventure plans, as well as to even modify your work sector. It’s also a great period in your life to ignite a fiery and exciting new relationship, so take action and get what you need!

Water dollies (Cancer: June 21-July 22; Pisces: Feb. 19-March 20; Scorpio: Oct. 23-Nov. 21). Fear of the unknown will rear its ugly head, but your adaptable nature will eventually enable you to roll with the flow. The trepidation will subside; provided that you go with your brilliant imagination to create something inspiring that is in alignment with the many inherent qualities of 2014. Listen to your great instincts and learn to trust your internal navigation system.

Earth lovers (Capricorn: Dec. 22-Jan. 19; Virgo: Aug. 23-Sept. 22; Taurus: April 20-May 20). These New Year winds of changes will prove most challenging to you. Why uproot yourself when you’ve been so committed? The answer is because it’s those very changes that are necessary to achieve the ultimate results you’ve been waiting for. It’s time to take inventory and let go of what’s bogging you down – freeing you to take advantage of new opportunities and ways of thinking that will serve you the best.

5 Ways To Get The Man of Your DREAMS Out of Your Dreams And Into Your LIFE!

As a professional life coach and author of the system and booklet, The Art of Manifestation, I guide people who seek extraordinary relationships in life. Why spend time in relationships that have reached their limit, aren’t productive, stunt your growth or are just plain toxic? There are reasons for these disruptive aspects of relationships and, fortunately, we are the source of the outcomes in these relationships. This means, of course, that we can control what we create.

Want the man of your dreams?

Follow these five simple steps and he’ll step right into your life!

1. Be clear about what you want. It’s not enough to say that you want to “be happy in a relationship.” When you’re vague, you actually open the door to some pretty unsatisfying results. Clarify exactly what kind of person you desire. How are you and your prospective other half similar and different? What do you have in common? How can that person enrich your life? How do you enrich his life? Think about what is really important to you in a relationship and what is not so important. Visualize the man you want with those specifics in mind. Also, don’t create unrequited love.

2. Clarify who YOU are for them – like the woman of their dreams! Communicate. Communication is key! In our modern times, communication has been reduced to a few confusing symbols and letters strewn about in the body of our text messages. Texting and emails are no way to truly convey important and foundation forming communications, especially in the early era of a relationship.

3. Learning the art of communication will serve you in all of your relationships and, after all, aren’t our relationships what it’s all about in life? Be genuine, clear, calm, and positive when engaging your listener by involving their world into the mix of your interests, needs and wants. Listen. People only want two fundamental things in life: 1.)To make a difference in the world and 2.) to be accepted and loved unconditionally. Truly listening to another person will help him feel accepted and understood – essentially valued –by his contribution to your life. Quiet your mental chatter, focus and participate by asking questions about what your speaker is saying. Listening can make all of the difference in the world! Take this on and watch your charisma grow and your world transform!

4. Be the person who you want. Demonstrating the qualities of the person you want to be with is a great way to work with the Law of Attraction. We want to be with someone who is open-minded, healthy, fun, positive and up-beat, right? Look to see if you express these traits. If so, you’ll attract like-minded people of all kinds from all four corners of the map! Practice patience and be unattached to results. Infinite patience doesn’t mean you won’t get results until the end of eternity, it just allows you to practice patience so that you are able to allow the one to show up.

5. Play full out; engage in life without placing expectations on the results. You’ll always be satisfied and may even discover something else sweet about what life has to offer other than your future sweet-y. Keep these practices up and your inner world will shift, leaving you to discover an outer world that is in alignment with ideal living. And when that happens, the man of your dreams may become a living reality sooner than you think. As Buddha said, “All we are is a result of our thoughts.” It may take some effort in the beginning before it becomes second nature, but it is oh so worth it.

L.U.C.K.! How Do We Create Luck In Our Lives?

The Art of Manifestation, in some ways, is a matter of luck. Sounds ironic, doesn't it? Many discuss manifestation as a proactive course that requires regular engagement and input for the very best results that help create happiness. This is true. But belief also helps sustain us while we attend the manifestation process on a daily basis. And belief requires faith and optimism, providing us openness, which creates growth and – you guessed it – manifestation. Take a look below at a wonderful excerpt from HEART, SMARTS, GUTS and LUCK that shows us how the many forms of luck allow us the create the lives that we really want – and really need.

LUCK: Random, coincidence, or created? Some people believe in luck and this belief, in many ways, makes them luckier. Luck is part of their optimistic outlook and openness to new things. Importantly, they embrace the notion that there are other forces beyond themselves and their own understanding, as well as serendipitous encounters that play a critical role in their success. There are many things that make up this Lucky Attitude, but the most critical is the trifecta of humility, intellectual curiosity and optimism. Here is a brief definition of these crucial factors, which help create your luck. The foundation of a Lucky Attitude is humility.

Humility is a key trait of high-performing leaders. Having a Lucky Attitude begins with awareness of your own limitations; appreciation of the broader efforts of those around you; and a nonjudgmental stance. If you’re in a position of power, leadership is not always easy. You need enough self-confidence to win the respect of others, but that confidence – which often comes with positional authority – needs to be counterbalanced with the recognition that there is so much more that you do not know.

Humility humanizes leaders and permits them to be luckier. It is the root of self-awareness and it crates the space to take on our next Lucky Attitude trait: intellectual curiosity. Intellectual curiosity is an active response to humility. Humility leads to intellectual curiosity or at least the capacity for it. People who are fully confident are less likely to question their personal assumptions or outlook on the world. A life builder who is intellectually curious has a voracious desire to learn more just about anything. He devours books, listens to suggestions and tirelessly explores new ideas. In the end, thanks to his willingness to meet new people, ask new questions, and go to new places, he has a greater chance of being exposed to and rewarded by luck. Optimism is the energy source for positive change.

If humility is the foundation for intellectual curiosity, then optimism gives people the belief, inspiration and energy that enable the realization of new possibilities. More, better and faster are always possible in the mindset of an optimist. It is a self-fulfilling prophecy: more luck tends to come to those people who believe in possibility and see the good in something before the bad. Optimists are givers of energy, rather than takers of it. Their positive dispositions put them in the path of a greater number of “surprise” encounters with good fortune. Driven by an unshakable belief in the potential for better, they tend, as well, to act on what they find through their intellectually curious pursuits. This completes the virtuous circle of the Lucky Attitude: optimism coupled with execution capabilities is what allows us to take full advantage of the luck bestowed on us. The luckiest people in the world are those who say to themselves: I am humble enough to realize that I don’t know how to and can’t do some things on my own; I am curious and courageous enough to ask questions that may be embarrassingly naïve; and I embrace the “glass half-full” optimism that the end result can always be improved upon.

Types of Luck Luck comes in three forms: Dumb Luck, Constitutional Luck and Circumstantial Luck. Of these, it is Circumstantial Luck that we can influence the most. Constitutional Luck deals with elements and environments into which you are born, and Dumb Luck is just what it sounds like – and is, therefore, the least within our sphere of influence potential.

Dumb Luck When we pick a card from a deck, we have a 2% chance of drawing the ace of hearts. The odds that the card will end up in our hands are slight, but a small chance exists that it might. Whatever card we end up holding will simply have to do with neutral probability, or put another way, pure Dumb Luck. Because we cannot govern this kind of Dumb Luck, I won’t say much more about it here.

Constitutional Luck Where one is born and the environment one is brought up in determines this kind of luck. Specific resources help define constitutional luck as well. If you are reading this, then you are already a benefactor of constitutional luck.

Circumstantial Luck You’re planning to meet your older brother for a casual lunch at a new restaurant. At the last minute, he calls to say he’s running late. To utilize your time, you make your way into a nearby park and you catch sight of an old friend you haven’t seen in years. After enthusiastically telling her about your new business, your old friends suggest you speak with an acquaintance of hers. This meeting results in driving you to new levels of success. You were uncannily lucky in the course of events. Why Ignorance Is Beneficial Having an optimistic Forrest Gump-like view of the world can unlock new perspectives. If you are oblivious to, or dismissive of, the risk factors in a given business situation, you might ultimately end up becoming more successful. It’s curious when you think about it: knowing your constraints in one case helps drive creativity, but not knowing them can also drive you toward innovative brilliance.

Excerpts from HEART, SMARTS, GUTS and LUCK by Tjan, Harrington and Hsieh

Watch The Art of Manifestation Video

Dates & Mates Radio Interview! "Spring" Into Love!

Interviewed by the vivacious Damona Hoffman!

Listen in and learn how to let intuition guide your love life!
How to find your soulmate!
How to become more intuitive and psychic!
How to create a successful platform to cause your relationship to flourish!
Being powerful and effective in all relationships!

Click here to listen to the full, unedited version of the show on UBN!
 

March's Featured Testimonial - 2014

THIS MONTH'S FEATURED TESTIMONIAL

I'm so impressed & grateful for the guidance that Sterling gave me! She is the real deal & I wish I could just yell from the mountain tops the truth she shares.

Through AOM I did extremely healthy learning about myself on a deep level & I find myself forgiving & releasing every day. I feel ultimate peace even when presented with chaotic situations. But I know people want to know about the magic, which I have experienced! Once I began, magic & miracles began to manifest IMMENSELY - from free groceries, to UNBELIEVABLE phone calls about new opportunities, to career changing & life changing emails, recognition, to more love, more abundance, & a supreme gratefulness!!!

The opportunities have been POURING in. A new found confidence & happiness has presented itself in what are high pressure situations. I am also feeling healthy, & fit & beautiful. I like myself more than ever & I love my relationship with the universe. Thank you Sterling, life coach, life changer, life friend!

Sofia G.

My Life Is Ideal Now!!

People Magazine Tarot Card Reading Guest - Love and Happiness!

People Magazine had Sterling visit their offices and perform over 10 readings for their editors and staff! Everyone had a wonderful time, was duly impressed with their readings and received much guidance, direction and clarity! It was a wonderful day for all.

Focus Magazine Focuses on Sterling's 2014's Top Tips!

Solutions for New Year's Resolutions

NEW YEAR'S RESOLUTIONS - TOP 10 TIPS FOR KEEPING ON TRACK!

As practicing spiritual life coach, I am often approached by clients who seek to fulfill important goals. Through my unique Art of Manifestation program, I am able to help them attain these goals when they create their wonderful New Year. Most of my clients wish to make lasting New Year’s resolutions stick. But how do they do it?

Right now, it's an exciting time to create New Year’s resolutions, right? Maybe yours include taking time to exercise, engaging socially with friends, attending meetup groups, eating healthier, saving money, taking a vacation, managing stress, taking an art class, helping others or simply taking more time out for you! It can also be a confronting time when we think about our past, unfulfilled New Year's resolutions. How do we keep these new resolutions from falling to the wayside? I've created an easy Top 10 Tips list for keeping your New Year's resolutions right on track!

1. Be sure it is something you can truly commit to.

Be honest with yourself. Is it something you truly want or does it just sound good on paper? Create resolutions that which inspires you the most at this time. Don't overwhelm yourself with too many commitments. Take on resolutions that light you up the most. Once those have come into being you can create more even before the year is up. It doesn't have to be a New Year to keep creating a new life for yourself.

2. Keep your focus

(Don’t go unconscious) (Start your day with) Morning visualizations will set you up for your day. Keep seeing yourself with the desired results and reaping the benefits of your New Year's resolutions. This will keep you on track and will have you connecting with the experience of doing it and experiencing the results.

3. Keep a daily diary.

Implement your New Year's Resolutions into your daily plans or weekly plans. Schedule it into your day and write about it at the end of the day. This keeps it present and alive for you and will help keep you on target.

4. Tell others

We want others to see our best side. We want to share stories of success, not failure. Telling others what you are up will keep you accountable to your word. So when someone asks you how your new workout routine is going you can reply by saying "Great!".

5. Be determined.

Do not let anything take you off track. Do not let anyone, including you, talk you into allowing old habits to creep back in. It's easy to go back to what is familiar to us, but what is familiar may have comforting factors it is not ultimately fulfilling. Remember, it takes a little time for your new year's resolutions to become what is familiar to you AND what is satisfying as well. Also, if you get off track, simply admit to it and get back on track. It really is that simple.

6. Take bite-sized action.

Commit yourself to one month, if you feel overwhelmed with the commitment you’ve made. After one month, access whether you’d like to take on another month. Repeat this action. It’s a little trick we can play on ourselves because it takes approximately 21 days for change to occur and for something to become more habitual and second nature. By the time a month is over chances are we’ve acclimated it into our life-style and by then slipping back into our old ways may prove to be harder than you think! Also, remember: Consistency is the key. If we can be consistent for a period of time the rest is easy. Plus the headway we make and the results we experience is enough to strengthen our commitment – for good.

7. Use the buddy system

Having a friend fulfilling on the same resolutions as yours is another way to stay on the path! There are lots of resolutions that could involve a buddy such as: exercising, meet ups, eating healthy, quitting bad habits, hobbies, just to name a few. When we have someone else sharing the same goals it can keep us in check by having someone else depending on us to fulfill. We don’t want to let our friend down or set a bad example, right? Our friends rely on us to reach our goals and fulfilling on our goal is twice as sweet with someone else celebrating the same results. Even if are New Year’s resolutions don’t involve others, we can still share our goals to have that added support.

8. Visual reminders.

Put images of what you desire everywhere. On the frig, in the bathroom, on your desk, on your screensaver, in your wallet, in your car. Where ever you spend time, put a visual reminder of what you want to come to fruition.

9. Reward yourself.

At least once a week, do something extra special for yourself as a reward for keeping to your goals. Maybe it's an inexpensive massage, having a sweet treat, buying yourself a piece of clothing, or something adventurous like horse-back riding, or maybe simply taking a scenic drive all on your own!

10. Acknowledge yourself.

Give yourself credit for taking on new habits and choosing to make lifestyle changes. That alone is the first step towards success.( Remind yourself you are worth it) Keep moving in the right direction and you will find yourself fulfilling on those "hard to keep" New Year's Resolutions in no time!

New Year's resolutions don't have to be a daunting experience it simply takes some practice and a little effort.(Applying these tips can make the difference between making your New Year’s resolutions stick or breaking them) Before your new year is up, these resolutions will seem like second nature and you will not only be reaping the benefits of your New Year's resolutions but you will be saying "hello" to a new you and a new way of life! (Even the simplest things can seem hard to change because we are creatures of habit but that doesn’t mean we can’t change and the good news about being creatures of habit is once these new changes take, it is a lot harder to change back to our old ways and old self.)

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Creating A New You and a New Life - Like Never Before!

Happy Holidays & Happy New Year! 2014!

It's that time when a New Year is heralding a re-birth and calls for us to follow suit. 

Time to say good-bye to certain things and hello to others. It's more than New Year's resolutions that eventually fall away or even making plans and having a "hook or by crook" attitude in acheiving them. The Art of Manifestation is wholly different, unique and unlike anything you've ever experienced. It's more about creating from a place of empowerment, not fear or the past. A limitless place where we create without boundaries and actually reach the sky! Since there really isn't any thing out there to compare The Art of Manifestation to, I will say it's unlike the life you've always known. More like speaking your dreams into existence just by your word. Effortlessly, easily and with speed and velocity. Gracefully dancing through life as it magically and miraculously unfolds. 

To get a closer glimpse into The Art Of Manifestation:

The Art of Manifestation Overview

The Art of Manifestation © is a singular and powerful program that enables Intuitive Life By Sterling clients to clear their past, define their truest dreams and create the life that they have always intended. Sterling offers The Art of Manifestation as a complete one-on-one 2-hour session at her ILBS spiritual life coaching practice in West Hollywood, California.

People have an uncanny way of putting past experiences into their future. This is the reason why we often get more of what we don't want instead of what we want. How do we change this? We don't. And here’s why. Change is simply re-arranging the same things in another order. At first glance, these things look different, but they really are not. Transformation, on the other hand, is the creation of something from nothing – a sort of genesis. When we transform, we can create a new idea without interference from the past. Think about when you were a child. How easy was it to invent new things and experiences in life? Pretty easy, right? We were free to live and create in a world of possibility, which is in sharp contrast to the restrictions that we develop and collect as adults. We also seemed to have endless amounts of energy, enthusiasm, conviction, belief, hope, faith and determination to go forth and make our dreams come true. So, what went wrong? Life happened.

Through The Art of Manifestation, Sterling takes you back to the beginning, enabling you to powerfully complete the past and be free to create the life you've always wanted. Then, she provides a unique and empowering template for success that allows you to powerfully stay you on course in all areas of your life every day. With this, you will experience The Art of Manifestation NOW, as the big picture begins to blossom with speed and velocity!

By simply following Sterling’s Art of Manifestation program, clients rapidly achieve their goals and attain the life that they have always desired effortlessly.

Isn't your life worth it?

Call or email for setting up your appointment today!

October's Featured Testimonial - 2013

THIS MONTH'S FEATURED TESTIMONIAL

Sterling is heaven sent! I started seeing her back in April with a friend for a quick reading. Not only was she spot on EVERYTHING in the reading, so I kept going back!

Since then....

I've gone to repeated appointments that included:
1) Tarot readings
2) Birth Chart
3) Life Coach Sessions

Every session with Sterling is so special. She is extremely caring, free-spirted, and always remembers anything we had discussed from the past. She isn't someone who is out to steal your money or is a fake (hard to come by in her industry!). She offers so much more than just card readings and feel blessed to have found her. 

To elaborate:

1) Tarot Readings

-Addiction alert!-- 
Her readings have always been so spot on and I've always left feeling better about ANY upcoming or stressful situation that has been on my mind. I can't even begin to explain the creepy examples of her accuracy. She once predicted this guy I was seeing had some type of addiction, she said "sex addiction." So of course, later that day I asked the guy and kind of looked at me in this odd manner like "how the heck did she know that?!" and admitted to it. Before I had even contemplated quitting my job and moving out of state, she predicted that the first reading in April and now it is actually happening this month!!  Anyways.. I could rant on how spot on her readings ALWAYS are.

2) Birth Chart Analysis

My birth chart was fun and definitely gave an amazing in-sight view how or why I may react ways to situations and has helped me apply certain tendencies to everyday life. Not to mention, this was a fun session that will also creep everyone out once you see your birth chart unfold.

THE MOST IMPORTANT SERVICE SHE OFFERS: 
3) LIFE COACHING

If you're feeling stuck in any area of life or have been reading about "The Secret" and want to make some serious changes... FAST..... THIS IS THE ANSWER FOR YOU.

Sterling has perfected the art of manifestation and blows "The Secret" out of the water. Once you implement her customized program, your life changes immediately. It's something you must experience yourself to really understand. My life went from complete chaos, to structured and organized bliss. Any dream you can imagine is right around the corner.. I quickly realized that anything in life is truly attainable. 

I've stop asking "when is this going to happen?"... and I just know that it will. Save your money by going to a therapist and try Sterling's Life Coaching methods first. Again, this is something you need to try for yourself to truly understand.

After my many life changing sessions with Sterling, I don't feel like I've wasted a penny. I've gained a life coach, friend, mentor and someone who will frequently check up on how I'm doing (always seems to be at the right times!). From her smile and energy.. to even to her advice.... you truly won't find a more genuine person to help you feel more grounded, have your questions answered and leave with a smile on your face.

Sara M.

August's Featured Testimonial - 2013

THIS MONTH'S FEATURED TESTIMONIAL

I went to Sterling for The Art of Manifestation system - it's life changing! In one 2 hour session she broke down her technique for transforming my life, with lots of fun, personal asides. I was initially worried about the investment in coaching sessions, but she immediately put me at ease with her warm, generous nature, & went through a step by step guide. I felt completely energized & confident after this session, & started implementing it as soon as I got home. Its been 3 days & I'm already seeing movement & success in my life. My representation called me with new opportunities out of the blue! Best of all has been the complete 180 in my mindset, I feel calmer and happier with this new outlook on life and knowing things are in motion. I highly recommend Sterling for life coaching, tarot and the Art of Manifestation! 

Renee T.